For My Baby Girl

Tiny movements like tiny kicks
Tiny baby, a mother’s bliss
Can’t wait to give the tiny you
Huge hugs and lots of kisses too

What tiny dreams you might have now
I would understand someday, somehow
I dreamed last night, your tiny face
An angel indeed, made from God’s sweet embrace

How else would mommy know
How much her tiny little angel has grown
How else would mommy guess
If her little angel has some requests

I know that somehow you could now hear
Oh, what a thrill you will bring us here!!
Now hush my baby, it’s time to rest
Inside my womb, your own calm nest

My Girls

I don't say it enough, but I really have the World's BEST Daughter! I really do. The kind of girl that melts your heart by wanting to hold you when you're feeling down or tired and tells you "just put your head on my heart Mommy, I'll make it better." The kind of girl that wants to be just like you so much that she'll imitate your every move. The kind of girl that makes you laugh because there's no other response you can give when she throws you for a loop by saying "taking away my toys Mommy isn't going to work." The kind of girl that can be all girly with Mommy but then turn around and two seconds later be wrestling or using tools with Daddy. The kind of girl that can be super shy around everyone but with Mommy and Daddy she lets loose to dance, sing or share one of her funny faces.

How did I ever get to be this lucky to have such an amazing person to care for and raise? How did I get chosen to be her mother? I don't have the answers, but I tell you what, I'm in awe and full of gratitude every day for the chance to spend time with her. She has truly made me a complete person and has shown me how to live life to the fullest and how to have fun every single day, every single moment. And, I thought I was supposed to be the one doing all the teaching!

As the birth of our second girl is right around the corner, I often ponder what she'll be like. Will she be like her sister? What will she be interested in? And, the thought that has crossed my mind several times, will I ever be able to love her as much as I love her big sister, and will we share the same kind of bond? I don't know who she'll look like or what her interests will be, but I know that like her big sister, she will be mine and I have already fallen in love with her. I can't wait to meet and greet her into our family. And, heaven knows, she's going to have one amazing big sister. Oh, I can't imagine how my heart will grow when she is born, but I know it will. I will get to be a mommy to two little precious girls! I just feel so blessed.

Growing Up

I remember my first blog post. Brooklyn was two days shy of turning 5 months old. I reminisced and was in awe over how she was growing up and changing so fast and right before my eyes. It's always something that veteran parents warn you about, but it's not until you actually become a parent that you understand the full meaning of what they are saying. You really, really have to be careful not to take for granted your children growing up, because it happens so fast and in my case, without my even realizing it at times.

At the beginning of June, we started something new, but something that we wanted to tackle before the baby is born. Kevin and I had talked in great length about it and when the right time was to start, and we figured it would take a good amount of time to be set in place. It's okay to admit we were wrong. After only 10 days, Brooklyn was officially potty trained, and wearing her Little Mermaid panties. Of course, we're still in the process of doing a complete and total potty training, because she is still wearing, but not wetting a diaper during her nap, and then again overnight. We are charting her process through her Potty Chart which was an idea that we stole from my parents as the chart idea was something they did to encourage me to do chores when I was growing up. At the end of the week, she gets a special surprise to reward her for being a big girl! She's very aware of when she feels the need to go and will tell us whether we are home or in public. It's wonderful. And, it does give Mommy and Daddy a nice break of changing diapers before the baby is born. We couldn't be more proud of her.

Brooklyn has always been interested in music, from a very young age. She has staked her claim of favorite songs and bands over her two and a half years, and most recently her favorite is Maroon 5's Makes Me Wonder. Kevin and I have become a bit tired of the song as she requests we play it over and over again on the iPod. She loves to jump and dance to the music and tries out all kinds of new moves. She is quite the dancer. So, I guess this next part comes because she enjoys music so much, but she has really, really taken to singing. She sings songs all the time. They are not necessarily ones that we taught her, as she has really taken to making up her own songs, but whatever the lyrics, she's always singing or humming. She sometimes sings herself to sleep at night. She sings while we are driving in the car, usually along with the radio. She sings while she is showering or getting a bath. She really sings a lot. It's very sweet, and she has such a sweet singing voice, something she obviously didn't inherit from her parents.

On Tuesday, her and I went on a date to a late breakfast, shopping and a movie. It's amazing how she can carry and lead a conversation the whole time. While we were eating breakfast, I just looked at her and realized, holy cow, I really don't have a baby anymore, just look at her! She's just so much fun to be around and it's incredible to think that she's my little girl, my precious daughter. And, to watch her grow up is something both Kevin and I delight in. We loved holding her on our chests as a baby, but every milestone or new thing she learns, we're right there with her celebrating and encouraging it. We so blessed to be her parents and start every day with her, trying to capture every moment, because she really is growing up so fast!

A special day

Today is a very important day of remembrance and praise in our household. Two years ago today, we (Kevin and I) dedicated our little Brooklyn to the Lord. We stood before our church congregation and our families and vowed to continuously praying for Brooklyn, instructing her in the way of the Lord, setting a godly example, and disciplining her as the Lord would discipline us.

But, it's important to point out that even though today is Brooklyn's baptismal birthday and tonight we will relight her baptism candle, baptism isn't something that just happens once and then is forgotten. Jesus certainly didn’t see baptism as the end, but as an entrance to a way of life. Baptism is how we live our life in Christ. We daily ask for and receive forgiveness of sins. We put down our guilt and shame at the foot of the cross and use our precious life energy to serve God’s family, to continue to learn about the God, to help God’s kingdom come here and now. How can we help our children say “I’m sorry” to God, to know they are forgiven and called to forgive others? Model saying “I’m sorry” to your child, your spouse, your friend, and to God in prayer. It will be contagious. In shared prayer, invite children to ask for God’s forgiveness and for a heart willing to forgive others. Remind your children daily that the Holy Spirit lives in them as the way Jesus is with them always.

"Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of heaven." ~Matthew 19:14

Our Surprise

We had a bit of a surprise on Thursday morning when after a second elective ultrasound to learn that we are in fact having a GIRL!

At our first ultrasound, the technician guessed that it was a boy because he didn't see any girl parts and thought he saw some boy parts. So, we began preparing for what a baby boy would be like in our family. We had a name already picked out and we began designing (in our minds) what the nursery would look like. My mom made Brooklyn's bedding and curtains and has offered to do the same for this baby. So, this past week, we made a trip to look at fabric swatches and found a pattern that we just loved and thought would fit the room just perfectly. We took along our camera and shot a few photos of each of the fabrics. We then designed a theme and idea for painting the room. We, of course (and thank goodness) didn't make any purchases.

So, there we were getting ready to walk into the ultrasound office to get a chance to see our little man again. Brooklyn had been talking about how excited she was to see her brother again. As the ultrasound began, the technician told us he would try and determine the sex of the baby for us first, or just confirm that we were having a boy. After watching our baby's bum for about five minutes, I asked the technician if he knew yet. He responded with, yes, he knew right away but was trying to get a clearer image for us to be able to see. After moving around a bit more, he focused on these three little lines between the baby's legs, indicating that this baby was actually a girl NOT a boy. In fact, the technician didn't know how anyone could have thought this was a boy, but said he has seen this type of thing happen a lot. I looked over at Kevin and he looked at me. We were both in shock and truly surprised. The technician carried on with the ultrasound showing us the baby's face, hands, feets, back (a very straight spine), rib cage, etc. He went back a few times to the baby's bum and each time we saw those three lines confirming a girl would join our family around the beginning of October.

Now, we are back at square one for names and room decor. But, that's really okay. It will be fun coming up with both. As we told our families and friends about our new realization, some asked if Kevin was okay with the news. He, in fact, is very thrilled and excited to be having another little girl. He absolutely adores Brooklyn, and even though she's a girl, she loves to pick up a hammer or screwdriver and help him fix things around the house. And, she is fascinated when he is shaving his face in the morning to the extent of pretending to shave her face too. She is very sweet and affectionate sometimes too, and he just eats that up.

Who knows what our new little girl will like and be into, but we are very excited to meet her and welcome her into our family, and we know that the relationship between Brooklyn and her will be something worth watching! And, yeah, I'm excited about having another little girl in the family...girls are so precious!

Our Getaway

That's right, this looks delightful, I know. And, this is where we are headed for a little getaway just the three of us. Our plans for this weekend and all of next week have changed several times as a wedding was postponed, we thought we'd go somewhere new, but then we realized I would be too pregnant to drive 12+ hours across the country to visit that vacation site. So, we settled on a mountain town that I used to go to quite a bit as a child, but neither Kevin nor Brooklyn have been to. And, when I say settled, I mean we decided, reached a decision after much pondering and brainstorming, not that this place isn't fabulous, because it is! And, what's really better than fresh mountain air?!

Starting tomorrow, Kevin and I have a glorious week and half off (I actually have 13 days off because of my work schedule) just to spend with our precious little daughter. We wanted this time so badly because with the baby coming at the end of the summer as this will be our last chance to have a vacation, a nice family getaway, just the three of us. We love our time with our Brooklyn. It's something we will always treasure, as I am most definite we will with our little man too.

Let me just say, I cannot wait!

Building A Great Cathedral

This is a wonderful story and a great inspiration to all moms...

It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the way one of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the phone and ask to be taken to the store. Inside I'm thinking, 'Can't you see I'm on the phone?' Obviously not; no one can see if I'm on the phone, or cooking, or sweeping the floor, or even standing on my head in the corner, because no one can see me at all. I'm invisible. The invisible Mom.

Some days I am only a pair of hands, nothing more: Can you fix this? Can you tie this? Can you open this? Some days I'm not a pair of hands; I'm not even a human being. I'm a clock to ask, 'What time is it?' I'm a satellite guide to answer, 'What number is the Disney Channel?' I'm a car to order, 'Right around 5:30, please.'

I was certain that these were the hands that once held books and the eyes that studied history and the mind that graduated cum laude - but now they had disappeared into the peanut butter, never to be seen again. She's going, she's going, and she's gone!

One night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return of a friend from England. Janice had just gotten back from a fabulous trip, and she was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in. I was sitting there, looking around at the others all put together so well. It was hard not to compare and feel sorry for myself as I looked down at my out-of-style dress; it was the only thing I could find that was clean. My unwashed hair was pulled up in a hair clip and I was afraid I could actually smell peanut butter in it. I was feeling pretty pathetic, when Janice turned to me with a beautifully wrapped package, and said, 'I brought you this.' It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe. I wasn't exactly sure why she'd given it to me until I read her inscription: 'To Sharon, with admiration for the greatness of what you are building when no one sees.'

In the days ahead I would read - no, devour - the book. And I would discover what would become for me, four life-changing truths, after which I could pattern my work: No one can say who built the great cathedrals - we have no record of their names. These builders gave their whole lives for a work they would never see finished. They made great sacrifices and expected no credit.

The passion of their building was fueled by their faith that the eyes of God saw everything. A legendary story in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man, 'Why are you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that will be covered by the roof? No one will ever see it.' And the workman replied, 'Because God sees.'

I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place. It was almost as if I heard God whispering to me, 'I see you, Sharon. I see the sacrifices you make every day, even when no one around you does. No act of kindness you've done, no sequin you've sewn on, no cupcake you've baked, is too small for me to notice and smile over. You are building a great cathedral, but you can't see right now what it will become.'

At times, my invisibility feels like an affliction. But it is not a disease that is erasing my life. It is the cure for the disease of my own self-centeredness. It is the antidote to my strong, stubborn pride. I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. As one of the people who show up at a job that they will never see finished, to work on something that their name will never be on. The writer of the book went so far as to say that no cathedrals could ever be built in our lifetime, because there are so few people willing to sacrifice to that degree.

When I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friend he's bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, 'My mom gets up at 4 in the morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand bastes a turkey for three hours and presses all the linens for the table.' That would mean I'd built a shrine or a monument to myself. I just want him to want to come home. And then, if there is anything more to say to his friend, to add, 'you're gonna love it there.'

As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot see if we're doing it right. And one day, it is very possible that the world will marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible women.